21 April 2015, I put my first step in India and I had a great feeling. I thought, now I can live the way I want and I can study peacefully because in Afghanistan I could not study and I could not live with my own demands as a young girl. My mobility was restricted by my family, because there were so much of uncertainty and insecurity outside.
When I reached Malviya Nagar it had adverse effect on me, because the streets were very dirty and when I entered my home I didn’t feel good because the rooms were much smaller than those rooms where I used to live in Afghanistan. Tears started rolling down because I used to live in big rooms back in Afghanistan. It is very difficult for me to shift in another country to be far away from all of things that once I loved – my friends, relatives.
However in the terrible situation of Afghanistan, I always dreamt about a carefree life. I always wanted to take my own decisions and live my own life. To wear dress of my own choices, mix and hang around with friends of my own choices without any interferences. Afghanistan is beautiful and I have always a desperation of exploring the beautiful landscape by travelling myself alone, which has never happened.
Once I took a risk in Afghanistan. I went alone to my granny’s house straight from school, without informing my mother in advance, to taste the flavour of what is called freedom. The distant from school to my granny’s house was 10km and that is quite a big distance in Afghanistan. I reached there taking my own time and discovering the path of my own which I have never got the chance to explore earlier. It was such a fun! That was one day when my mother was very anxious and helpless till I called her up from my granny’s house.
Here I have freedom till 9pm (licensed freedom). I have the permission to hang out with friends in the presence of any elderly person, to go anywhere, shopping mall with any male family member.
Sometimes I wish to select a T-shirt or a dress of my choice away from any other control. Here also once I went to the distant park with friends without letting my mother know about it. We played and had lots of fun.
Since I am in India now, I have some freedom to go to school and study according to my choice. I want to become a lawyer. There are severe violence which my relative, friends and their family are experiencing in Afghanistan. The condition of women from poor background is also terrible. They are the victim of domestic violence and hardly can access justice. My dream is to become a successful lawyer and fight for the helpless women. I would like to take any kind of challenges to defend their cases.